My Birthday

Well here it is, September 27th, 2007. I am now 24 years old. It's so weird how time can crawl by or fly by even though the clock is always ticking at the same rate...or at least we think it is. Dun dun duuuuuuh....(that was my climactic theme music, I hope my try at phonetic spelling made that clear...) ...Anyway, it seems like not too long ago when my birthday was the epitome of fun and glory and I couldn't wait for the party my mom would throw me where there'd be some theme running through the decor, the games, and the cake. Usually there'd be some mass gathering of small girls, which of course always makes for a good time, and most importanly, a wide variety of presents...I used to count down the days till my birthday, eagerly ancticipating the moment I'd wake up to that wondrous day much like the feeling of Christmas morning...Yet it's been years since I've had such anticipation mounting or a countdown or a party...Something happens as you grow older...Well for some of us anyway. Some people simply start to dislike the process of aging, wanting to stay eternally 17 for some reason...Others simply stop celebrating themselves...As I turn another year older I find that birthdays, like New Year's, are a good time to reflect and stop and ask yourself what you're doing with the time you have. I guess this is where I tend to get a little discouraged on my birthdays. I am like, What am I doing? There is still this prideful part of me that feels like I should be accomplishing some great thing that will give my life more substance. I realized this last night as, yet again, I couldn't fall asleep. I realized how sad that as a Christian I still measure my life in this way. I want to be faithful to the Lord and I want to serve Him in any way He asks me- which can be small or big to human eyes, but I'm pretty sure are all the same to Him. In this job I've started to understand the restlessness that some stay at home moms feel. You spend most of your time in the house speaking to small children and part of you feels like you should be out participating in the world...Yet I know God has put me in this place and I know that He is teaching me a lot about Him and about myself. So really, there is nothing better to accomplish than exactly what's being accomplished right now- and not by me, but by my God....I know that I will never find fulfillment in anything but being His child and my disatisfaction only comes from immaturity spiritually...
So anyway, my birthday now brings about a lot more reflection than it does giddyness, or however that should be spelled, (I'm pretty sure Paul will help me out with that) but I am thankful to the Lord for another year on this earth that I grew in knowing Him and I pray that if I am to live to another birthday that I will only see more growth in faith, more humility, and a continual pursuit of Him.